2010

Almost 1o months now, still no sign of me moving on yet.

Happy new year.....

I guess the reason why I like flagging so much is because it is something that reminds me of you..

I call it "Screwed-Up-September"

For most of you who already know, last month I broke something really expensive in college. For those who don't, I did. And it's supposed to cost a small fortune. Not only that, in Luke's open house, I also happen to break my glasses. Yup, I believe the title of this post explains it all.

Okay, back to the "expensive-thing-Ian-the-dumbass-broke", It's called a total station, used for land surveying. The total station in the link is not exactly the one I broke but very similar. How I broke it? Good question. There's actually a series of events to lead to this but I'll keep it short. I tripped over the tripod which the total station is on top of and the total station dropped on the ground and rolled on the road. Honestly speaking, I was scared shitless. And instead of the typical we should report this incident to the lab assistant, we decided to conceal this matter. Although we got found out that very evening.

Anyway, it's already been almost 2 months now and since the college admin and my lecturer didn't pursue into this matter any further, we all decided to let it slide. All these while I've been trying to find someone or something to blame being the typical human that I am. I finally settled with this.

“Ahhh Gravity,

Thou art a heartless b*tch”

-Dr. Sheldon Cooper-

I don't love you...

I know this is really weird. Ian updating his blog in just a few days after his last post. Almost as weird as Ian started blogging. But screw it. Somehow I started regretted posting my previous post. But screw that too. Too lazy to delete it.

So this week's supposed to be exam week. Should've started studying weeks or even a month ago. But screw it. So I only started studying on Monday which is like 2 days ago and while I was compiling my playlist for my 'studying time', I ran across a song that made me laugh till my stomach hurts. 'I don't love you' by MCR. I remember that song was like the theme song for my 1st break up. But the best part was how Su Wei, Loong aka DJ M@X MINION (LOL), Hong Jun and Nick tried cheering me up. Especially Loong and Su.

Man.... I miss secondary school life. Seeing the same retarded faces every single day. Feel your heart skip a beat whenever you see your crush (maybe that's just me). Talking endlessly about your dreams and what you plan to accomplish after graduating. Eating nasi lemak with Loong. Eating fried egg salad with Su. Smuggle some snacks into the class to munch on. Skip class just to do something that's definitely a waste of time but so worth doing. And you have so much time to waste on drawing. Playin wit Pyan's tits (i still do that). Singing loudly and out of tune just because we could do it. Playing stupid 'fate' games. Screwing up a performance I had with Sara. Man... I could go on but I think you got my point.






I miss u guys..

A lot..

You know you've got it bad when...

Well, today was supposed to be stay-at-home-and-do-assignments-and-study-because-finals-is-near-day. But instead, I was forced to go coll to apparently "sit for a quiz". Which actually turns out to be a session of "waste time and chit chat with your lecturer" class. The worst part is that the person who actually managed to convince me to go to coll today did not show up because apparently he can't wake up. And he even stays in the stupid hostel while I have to travel all the way from Shah Alam. Moving on to the positive side, I managed to catch a lil shut eye in class since my lecturer decided to come late by say.... 1 and a half hours.

Anyway, what I rreally want to say is that...... I dreamt about Shen-Ly again during that ridiculously short period of nap. And it felt so real that I actually hoped with all my heart that I won't have to wake up.....ever. In the dream, I somehow was able to ride a superbike which really is weird coz I can't even ride a bike. And she was clutching my waist really tightly as i sped along the highway (yes, i know it sounds crazy). And I sped all the way into a TESCO. I know.. why TESCO? Then we went shopping for stuff and walking around pushing the trolley together. And I have this habit of hugging Shen-Ly from behind and kissing her neck while she's absorbed in a book in MPH or lookin at smt. And she always gets startled by it. =) Well, it's the same in this case and she spun around and plant a gentle kiss on my lips. God... It felt so real. she held my hand as we walked on and, get this, she asked me to stop her from going to Russia. But then again, it could be because I really don't want her to leave, although she left already. And yea, we just kept walking around and I spent most of the time hugging her. When suddenly out of nowhere came like a dozen of police and I woke up. I felt like dying, right on the spot! All because my lecturer came.

Then, the stupid day goes by like usual. Take the bus to ktm Serdang, then train to midvalley. And I actually find it hard to walk into midvalley. Usually i head straight to the bus stop and take the U65 bus straight home but I was supposed to buy a gift for Caleb from the cell. Happy b'day big man! Which forced me to step foot into midvalley. And trust me when I say I spent the whole day strolling down memory lane. Everywhere I go, everywhere I look reminds me of Shen-Ly. Sigh. Conclusion is.. I miss her like crazy!! Once I reached home, the 1st thing I did was browse through the pictures we took together and watched some of the videos she took for me long time ago. And also viewed her FB page. And I saw some of her pictures her friends posted when they were in Russia. She seemed so happy with her life and friends. It saddens me that I can't possibly give her happiness anymore. She moved on....... Well..




I love you Lai Shen-Ly.

I really do. All the best in everything you do....

WAWAWAWAWA!!!

And I know that most of my posts are all about me makin a big fuss and all.. whish is quite true but still.. A post is a post rite? Anyway.. Wanted u guys to listen to a very beautiful song which in my opinion is also kinda sad.. And I love the girl's vocal. Owh.. The song is posted on my umm.. the ninja-song-box-tune-or-whatever thing. And I also posted the lyrics so you could read and hear at the same time. I know. I'm so thoughtful rite? Enjoy.. =)

ALL TIME LOW

"Remembering Sunday"

He woke up from dreaming and put on his shoes
Started making his way past 2 in the morning
He hasn't been sober for days

Leaning now into the breeze
Remembering Sunday, he falls to his knees
They had breakfast together
But two eggs don't last
Like the feeling of what he needs

Now this place seems familiar to him
She pulled on his hand with a devilish grin
She led him upstairs, she led him upstairs
Left him dying to get in

Forgive me, I'm trying to find
My calling, I'm calling at night
I don't mean to be a bother,
But have you seen this girl?
She's been running through my dreams
And it's driving me crazy, it seems
I'm going to ask her to marry me

Even though she doesn't believe in love,
He's determined to call her bluff
Who could deny these butterflies?
They're filling his gut

Waking the neighbors, unfamiliar faces
He pleads though he tries
But he's only denied
Now he's dying to get inside

Forgive me, I'm trying to find
My calling, I'm calling at night
I don't mean to be a bother,
But have you seen this girl?
She's been running through my dreams
And it's driving me crazy, it seems
I'm going to ask her to marry me

The neighbors said she moved away
Funny how it rained all day
I didn't think much of it then
But it's starting to all make sense
Oh, I can see now that all of these clouds
Are following me in my desperate endeavor
To find my whoever, wherever she may be

[Juliet Simms:]
I'm not coming back (forgive me)
I've done something so terrible
I'm terrified to speak (I'm not calling, I'm not calling)
But you'd expect that from me
I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt, now the rain is just (You're driving me crazy, I'm)
Washing you out of my hair and out of my mind
Keeping an eye on the world,
From so many thousands of feet off the ground, I'm over you now
I'm at home in the clouds, and towering over your head

[Alex Gaskarth:]
Well I guess I'll go home now...
I guess I'll go home now...
I guess I'll go home now...
I guess I'll go home

FRUST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today was really a @$$$%#^%&*%#% DAY!!! I screwed up BIG time on ma Maths mid-term test. 20 FFFFing percent man... I actually hav from 11am-8pm to do some laz minute revisions and stuff. But I let my overconfidence take control and lead me on to the dark side of..... uh.... studyin? Whatever it is, I just hope I could get 1 more chance to study and redo it.. But then again, what's done is done right? Keep that crap to yourself. I'm still FRUST!!!!!!!!